So this week Lifetime continues to not shell out for guest stars and keep things in-house. Design for Heidi! Not for her to wear, but for her “sportswear line.” Not that weird sportswear which really means “the sort of outfit Katherine Hepburn wore in the 50s,” either. We’re talking “the sort of sportswear that can make little sneakers that are just this side of toe-shoes look fashionable” style sportswear. Of course, it’s a team challenge, four teams of three each, with the winning line of three looks being produced and sold by Heidi herself.
The plan was to force the designers to race, and the top four runners are team captains. Cecilia, who is apparently just fed up after not being sent home last week takes one look at this nonsense and quits. The remaining 11 run the race, with Olivier falling down and semi-passing out from whatever amphetamines he’s taking. Once his drama is over, the four winners–MoldedHair Josh, Bryce, AnthonyRyan and Viktor–pick their teams.
So they pick their teammates in order of first-second-third-fourth place. Moldedhair Josh picks Anya on his first pass for her design ability, and then Becky on his second for her sewing skills. Bryce takes Kimberly on his first pass because he absolutely does not want to be paired with a bottom dweller, and she won the last challenge. On his second pass he picks Danielle because his other option is Bert. AnthonyRyan picks Barbie Laura on his first pass since they won the stiltwalker challenge together (albeit by accident) and Viktor picks Olivier on his first pass.
So you would think that Anthony would have the choice now to either pick Bert or pick Cecilia’s vacated spot we’re all assuming is going to go to the last person eliminated, Julie. Instead Tim simply saddles him with Bert and then gives the real prize to Viktor–he gets to choose ANY of the eliminated contestants from the last four weeks to come back and be his teammate.
The answer (which was vocally unanimous across all teams) was to bring back Mormon Josh. Really? But he’s terrible! Well yes, but he’s a nice guy who doesn’t upset any one, with the bonus that no one feels threatened by him, because he is terrible. Of course he’s the choice of the other contestants to come back.
Two things before we get to the clothes–Heidi’s two last-minute rule changes. The first was the time issue.
Have you even gone back and watched the old ProjRun reruns on Style Network? You know what I hear Tim Gunn say in those that I don’t anymore?
“Designers, you have until midnight tonight and then all day tomorrow to finish your garments.”
What happened to two-day challenges? No seriously, Lifetime, I want an answer. Are you really just that cheap? Project Runway fans have wailed ever since the move to Lifetime that the designs just aren’t what they used to be. You know why? Because the designers don’t have the TIME anymore. Back in the Bravo seasons, a designer had time to scrap an entire garment and remake because s/he had TWO DAYS. Here, they have at best, 12 hours? Damn straight you’re seeing some turn to glue. This week was worse. With all the idiot racing, and drama and what not, by the time they made it back to Parsons with their fabric it was 3:30pm and they only had until 11pm. Seven and a half hours. That’s it. So of course when Heidi did her walk through, no one was anywhere near in good shape. But did they give them an extra day? No. Instead they gave them until 4am. Barbie Laura was the only one smart enough to say “Wait, we’re thanking them for letting us stay up until 4am?” Seriously. Bravo made them go home at midnight and sleep 8 hours. Lifetime tells them to stay up until 4am and then makes drama-hay from the sleep deprived sickness some of them feel when they’re back in the workroom at 8am. Not cool, Lifetime.
The second rule change was due to a bigger issue: No team produced a winning line. At least one garment in every line was awful enough that Heidi simply wouldn’t produce it. Instead she chose her two favorite designs of the night and called it close enough. Let’s look at those now. Continue reading