Line up Z-list celebrities. Y’all made me watch the MTV Movie Awards last night because I wanted to see the new Civil War footage, judge Suicide Squad in the wake of the Batman v Superman fiasco, and squeal over Newt Scamander as the 1920s fashions of the Wizarding World. (More squeeing on that subject can be found here.) But the rest of you? You were mostly awful. Line up and be judged wanting in your fashion choices.
The Less Terrible
Any other time and place Charlize, and we’d be ok. But this is the MTV Movie Awards. Dress for the MTV Awards and then tone it down five notches. This is way too classy.
Jessica Chastain, see everything we just told Charlize Theron, and then make it a mini dress.
At least Lizzy Caplan didn’t go for classy, just overdressed.
Mr. the Rock knows what’s up. (Also, did you hear he announced he was Hufflepuff? Your Argument is Invalid.)
Anna Kendrick overdressed, but then didn’t take her coat off or stand on the red carpet, so it worked out.
Chris Pratt understood. Dress like you just arrived via motorcycle.
Ed Skrein did not. But he looks so British upper class, I suppose we’ll let it slide. This time.
Brittany Snow ruined this look with those shoes.
Grace Helbig gets it right–casual, with cut outs, but classy cut outs that you have to look twice to notice.
Rebel Wilson, close your mouth when they’re flashing the cameras.
Why….why does Cara Delevingne? Why? This must be Taylor Swift’s fault.
Kat Graham, with way too much lace up.
Kevin Hart, reminding us all that he is not Mr. the Rock. Also that in order to pull off the “I just got off the motorcycle” look, one must believably look like one ever straddled a motorcycle.
The Lonely Island attempting to do the Chris Pratt and failing.
All red carpets apparently must have a Kardashian or a Jenner to make their required quota.
Key and Peele make movies now. Your argument is still invalid.
No Emilia Clarke. No. Bad Emilia. Go give that to Drogon to burn please.
I can’t get past Gigi Hadid wig. The rest is terrible too but…what is that on her head? And why?
So, ok, there’s always one that shows up to these things mostly naked because no one has ever heard of them, and it’s the only way they’ll get noticed. It’s just rare that that person also happens to be giving a hyped solo performance during the broadcast that’s one of the reasons we’re supposedly tuning in. But then again, I’d never heard of Halsey, either before the red carpet or her performance, so I suppose her choice to be the naked one was correct.