Eurovision 2016: Semi Finals Part 2

Eurovision opened their second set of semi final performances noting that both China and the US would be airing the Grand Final for the first time in the show’s sixty-plus year history. But since they know that the populations of those countries might need a Vox style explainer as to what the hell they are watching, they decided they’d explain….IN SONG.

No, they did not follow it up with a song explaining the voting procedures. I assume they’re saving it for Saturday.

Let’s check in on the performances and see who makes it through to Saturday’s round and who gets left behind.


A few observations: the second semi final had all my favorites in it, which was a relief considering that there was no one I would root for on Tuesday. Not only did we have a naked performance with wolves (well kinda) but we had Serbia, Latvia, Belgium and the Ukraine all serving up well done numbers to root for, as well as Austrailia showing that if they let too many acts from the non-Euro show in the Europeans will have more competition than they can probably handle.

Through to Final

Latvia: Justs “Heartbeat”

I really liked Latvia last year, and I like them again this year too. I’ve got a thing for downbeat EDM and progressive verses, what can I say?

Poland: Michał Szpak “Color Of Your Life”

If Weird Al did Revolutionary War cosplay and a forgettable song.

Israel: Hovi Star “Made Of Stars”

The circus going on behind him was rather incongruous with his Flock of Seasgulls hair and run of the mill song.

Serbia: Sanja Vučić ZAA “Goodbye (Shelter)”

Now this is the sort of ultra dramatic number I expect from Eurovision. She between her outfit and the track, this is a direct to the finals number.

Lithuania: Donny Montell “I’ve Been Waiting For This Night”

The lost member of One Direction turns up to represent Lithuania.

Australia: Dami Im “Sound Of Silence”

The first country outside the Eurozone to be allowed to compete returns with a strong contender. If they win, there are going to be some very irritated countries.

Bulgaria: Poli Genova “If Love Was A Crime”

I love the idea of the light up clothing, but not when they wind up looking like night time bike rider reflective panels.

Ukraine: Jamala “1944”

No joke, I loved just about everything about this act, from the digital set design with the tree of life, to the outfit, to the song itself.

Georgia: Nika Kocharov&Young Georgian Lolitaz “Midnight Gold”

A last gasp from those who still love hard rock. I am over the moon it made the finals.

Belgium: Laura Tesoro “What’s The Pressure”

If you like a little white girl doing her best Michael Jackson homage in silver spangly shorts, this one’s for you.

Failed to Qualify

SwitzerlandRykka “The Last Of Our Kind”

She’s smoking. The song is only alright.

Belarus: IVAN “Help You Fly”

The show chickened out and wouldn’t let him actually be on stage naked with the wolves.Still the over the top nature was hilarious. How is this not in the finals!?! Eurovision voteers, you’re dead to me.

Ireland: Nicky Byrne “Sunlight”

Ugh, how can you be both earwormy and forgettable?

F.Y.R. Macedonia Kaliopi “Dona”

This sort of dramatic song is perfect for Eurovision…in 1965.

Slovenia: ManuElla “Blue and Red”

And American country song vibe called Blue and Red…and all I am is staring at the harness leatherwork decorating her cleavage. Why do American networks think we won’t like this?

Denmark: Lighthouse X “Soldiers Of Love”

Someone should ask Demark what they did with the other two members of the boy band they meant to send.

Norway: Agnete “Icebreaker”

I’m pretty sure that Norway singing about Icebreakers is one cliche too many. Loved her leather lasercut gown though!

Albania: Eneda Tarifa “Fairytale”

The song was forgettable, but the dress and the hairdo were on point. Too bad she stood stock still like she was afraid she’d fall over if she tried to move.


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